The Ancient And Honorable Order of Ephraim Clampus Vitus
As an existing Member of the Reorganized Western
Brotherhood of The Most High and Honorable Ancient Order of E Clampus Vitus, You are
Eligible to Apply to the West Virginia Lodge, Brought Forth from The
Beehive Tavern
in 1845 by The One and Only EPHRAIM BEE, The Grand Noble
Gyascutis of ALL this Earth and Beyond all Boundaries of Time and Space.
The Beehive Lodge and the Remnant of Ephraim's Most Honorable Vipers, is
Entrusted to Protect and to care for the Last Resting Place of the Bones of
EPHRAIM.
YOU are Invited to Join With This Honorable Lodge in the Crusade to keep the
Ancient embers burning where ECV began.
YOU are Invited to the call of the Trumpets, which Herald the Sacred Places
and call Forth The Brethren.
YOU are Invited to Send by Courier or in Person, A Goodly Sum of Gold
Dust,
which will bee used to Erect a Sacred Monument to Honor And Proclaim that
in the year of Eighteen Hundred and Forty Five, In the Beehive Tavern in
Lewisport, Virginia, Ephraim Bee, Proprietor, Founded And Brought Forth The
Ancient And Honorable Order of E CLAMPUS VITUS.
This Indenture is to be used by Western Brethren in Good Standing to Apply
for Associate Membership into the Original Beehive Lodge of the Virginias
&
Outposts.
---
Answer the Following Questions to the Best of Your Recollection while in a
Sober State:
1.) Why are You a "Clamper"?
2.) What Lodge of ECV Claimed your Earthly Soul and When?
3.) Were You or an Ancestor Born in Western Virginia?
Who, What, Where, When?
4.) Have ye Been on a Pilgrimage to Ephraim's Grave?
5.) What Hardships have you had in your Miserable life?
6.) What is or was yer Profession?
7.) Were YOU ever a member of RAM, Boy Scouts or Pathfinder?
8.) Brag on One of yer Good Deeds.
9.) Tell a Story.
10.) Who is yer Favorite Honorable Clamper and Why?
As a Western Brethren in Association with the
Most High And Honorable
Ancient Order of Ephraim Clampus Vitus; YOU are Expected to bee of Good
Character (And bee a Good Character);
YOU are Expected to do Good Deeds whenever and wherever possible;
YOU are Expected to Promote Historical (And Hysterical) Preservation
wherever and whenever possible;
Failure to adhere to aforesaid Conditions May Cause you Great Boils and
Hemorrhoids, along with a general feeling of Low Self- esteem and Banishment
from This Most Sacred Order.
-Ifin ye AGREE to The Aforementioned Terms and Conditions,
Filled out the Questionnaire to the best of yer ability,
Donated a Goodly Amount of Gold dust and affixed a hair off yer head to
the
"X", And, Filled out the form below,
YOU May bee Considered for Membership into the West Virginia Lodge. (And Get
a Nifty "Sheepskin" for yer Wall)
(Yer hair will bee Initiated at the Grave of Ephraim in your stead)
- - - - - - -
X (Tape it Here)
YOUR Full Name (And Title ifin ye have one):
Nickname ifin any at all:
Birthdate/Place:
Yer Address (ifin any at all):
Yer Present Chapter of ECV:
After YOU Have Completed the Aforementioned
Document, YOU May Send it Along
with Aforesaid Gold Dust and A hair off yer head to the Following Address:
EPHRAIM CLAMPUS VITUS
C/O Steve Myers
7976 Agate Way
Dublin, CA. 94568
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